Become interested in other people you share the planet with, as you will become more interesting as a result of being interested.
Ordinary people. I love people and find them to be incredibly exciting and complex beings. It is essential to take time to be interested in others.
Everyone possesses something interesting about themselves no matter how different and weird it might be. It is essential to take time to listen as I always think there is something to learn. I hear people complaining about the dates they go on, about the person they went out with being boring or complaining about how the person was this or that. I have also had my share of disappointments and failures in the dating arena, but I still find people interesting. The person might not be for me, yet I find the interest.
As a coach, I know that we can always find something good in other people. If you want people to like you, or if you want to develop relationships, it’s important that you have an interest and care about people by accepting people as they are. You can always find something good about the people you date and meet in your life. I often ask my clients who have weaknesses in this area to challenge themselves to find something interesting in the people they meet and know.
Bring an end to the thought that people are boring. People are not boring. If you find people to be boring, look inside and try to discover why you think they are boring. Could it be that you are boring and can find nothing interesting in another person because maybe there’s nothing interesting about you? Could it be that you are looking for someone to entertain you and people are not entertaining enough for you? Like I said, everyone is interesting.
I read about a reformed gang member who did 13 years in prison and left the notorious Mara Salvatrucha aka MS-13. The Mara Salvatrucha gangs have cliques, or factions, located throughout the United States and Latin America and are composed mostly of Salvadorans, Guatemalans, Hondurans and other Central Americans. You know, you see these things on the telly and then it’s like all of a sudden you bump into someone who in a hundred years you never think that your paths would cross. I meet people everywhere and when I say everywhere, I really mean that. And one day, at my usual brunch place, I met a former MS-13 gang member.
Armed with my Discovery Channel documentary information, I found this man very interesting. As I looked into his face and asked him about his teardrop tattoos on the corners of his eyes, which I recognized as symbols of the notorious gang MS-13 by way of watching the Discovery Channel reports on gangs in America. Based on the commentary on the documentary, I smiled and asked him jokingly, “How many people have you killed?” Not expecting to get a real response, he replied by saying, “I spent the last 13 years in prison. I must have done one or two.”
I was in a state of disbelief and shock at his honesty. I was not expecting a response of that magnitude. He, in turn, asked me where I was from based on my accent.
He continued to share with me his gang affiliations (MS-13). As he continued to order his pancakes, he shared about jumping in and the rules for leaving the gang which the documentary described as getting beat up by your friends. He told me that there is a structure for leaving the gang if one goes to prison. He chose to leave the gangs of his youth behind. He was extremely pleasant, not at all as menacing as I would have been led to believe. His life was different from mine, and the link that brought us together was pancakes and the generosity of sharing our stories in an instant. We giggled and parted energy.
Again I say, have an interest in the people you share the planet with. People are extremely fascinating and have amazing stories full of passion and adventure. Rise up, people! Practice spending time and become interested in other people you share the planet with as you will become more interesting as a result of being interested.