By Yako and Krystal

March 30, 2015, 8:39 am

 

I decided to let my hair grow. My hair is usually anywhere between a buzz cut and a classic crew cut, but now I want to grow it longer — slick style, like Alexander Skarsgard or more of a tousled side parting like David Beckham, or something in between. Not sure yet and I am just letting it grow at this point until it is long enough to be handled by a proper hair stylist.

What I noticed though is that my hair line is starting to recede. In my case it is two horse shoes or the M shape receding hair line. This is one of the things that men are kind of nervous and insecure about: thinning hair or going bald. I don’t like it either, but there is not a lot you can do about it.

At first I thought I could hide it by combing my hair in such a way that it would cover the horse shoe inlets, but it only seemed to make it worse. I realized that by trying to hide it, I actually drew more attention to it! That was kind of an interesting revelation to me.

So now I slick it all back proudly displaying my horse shoes! By the way, horse shoes bring good luck. It gives me kind of a smooth and mature look and I actually like it. I get mixed responses. Some like it a lot, others preferred the more preppy crew cut look.

Made me think about other “flaws” in bodily functions or appearance. I write flaws in quotation marks on purpose, because I’m not so sure whether we should refer to them as flaws in all cases. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, a flaw is defined as: “a defect in physical structure or form; an imperfection or weakness and especially one that detracts from the whole or hinders effectiveness.” With this definition, I do not feel flawed with my receding hair line.

Let me look at some other bodily “deficiencies” I am struggling with:

Body and weight: I’m not overweight, but sooner underweight. However, my body is definitely not toned like the guys I see in the gym. Great to look at, but I like imperfections in someone’s figure. Makes a person more human.

The other day I saw this lady climbing the subway stairs in front of me. She had some serious junk in her trunk, about 3 feet wide. And she was wearing stretch jeans. She was struggling a bit to get up those stairs and some weight loss would probably improve her condition, but I truly admired her for wearing those jeans. In no way was she trying to hide her voluptuous forms. Well done! Be proud of your body no matter what.

Being overweight can be unhealthy, but the other day I learned that weight and heart condition are not as closely correlated as was believed. For example the Atkins diet prescribes eating a lot of red meat, but I heard on CBS This Morning that eating a lot of red meat clogs up your arteries. So you can loose weight and at the same time increase the risk of a heart attack.

I also saw this video about this guy who lost some serious weight and now has to deal with excessive skin. He preaches body positivity, but was ashamed of his excessive skin and in order to address that, he decided to record his body on video and post it online. I have amazing respect for that and by doing so he shows that he is the beautiful person that he already was.

Sight: I wear glasses. Or actually I don’t, but I should. I have a pair of glasses, but I hardly ever wear them. They just feel uncomfortable. When I first bought them I thought to get glasses that are as inconspicuous as possible. Simple gray and frameless. But now after I have had them for a while, they seem so mundane and I see people with the most amazing glasses with expressive frames. I need to get new ones and wear them with pride!

Age: Yes, I’m getting older as well. I used to have a problem with that, especially when I turned 30. I suddenly felt ancient and out of grace. Now that I am 43, I feel mature and sexy 🙂 Not always though. Sometimes on a bad day, I look in the mirror and I look tired and worn out. But bad days are part of life and nothing to worry about. A good night sleep, a good workout, or a hair cut will take care of that and that brings me back to my hair.

In conclusion, be proud of who you are and accept your “flaws,”  even show them off and beat those judging assholes to the punch so no one can use them against you!

Yako


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About The Author

Yako: Born on a farm in The Netherlands, Europe, I was always on quest for adventure. As a small boy, I was already interested in learning about other cultures and pretended I was fluent in American (I later learned that Americans speak English). At the age of 23, I traveled to South Africa where I lived for seven months to finalize my thesis for my master's in Business Administration. After that, I worked for eight years for a bank in Amsterdam, but I became restless and decided to quit my job and make the big leap across the ocean to New York. Studying arts and culture management at Pratt Institute helped me eradicate some of the prejudices I had of Americans. I never thought I would stay this long. But now eight years later, I'm still here. I live in Central Brooklyn and work for Bedford Stuyvesant Restoration Corporation with great satisfaction. So far, my life feels as if I’m on one big adventure. | Krystal: As a native of Michigan, I moved to New York with a limited perspective of the depth and importance of social differences. Having a passion for creativity, I accepted the various ideas behind expression and equality that poured out from this beautiful, diverse place called Brooklyn. After graduating from Pratt Institute in 2006 with a degree in Communications Design and barely surviving the effects of forced independence, I started an open relationship with the nonprofit world and began to willingly become my own person. Since then, I have been employed and freelance as a graphic designer, with tons of exposure to the things that fascinated me as a child. Living in two culturally different environments has granted me a faceted understanding of social norms and injustices that I feel compelled to speak on. Though visual art and design have been my concentrations since grade school, writing and sharing thoughts socially has been my core calling. In keeping my promise to my parents, I have finally decided to write for social impact. Standing up for my truth while seeking and discovering the truths of others is the way in which I've chosen to take that on. So far, I've discovered that the most direct route to societal improvements begins with the coupling of self-awareness and humility.

Yako: Born on a farm in The Netherlands, Europe, I was always on quest for adventure. As a small boy, I was already interested in learning about other cultures and pretended I was fluent in American (I later learned that Americans speak English). At the age of 23, I traveled to South Africa where I lived for seven months to finalize my thesis for my master's in Business Administration. After that, I worked for eight years for a bank in Amsterdam, but I became restless and decided to quit my job and make the big leap across the ocean to New York. Studying arts and culture management at Pratt Institute helped me eradicate some of the prejudices I had of Americans. I never thought I would stay this long. But now eight years later, I'm still here. I live in Central Brooklyn and work for Bedford Stuyvesant Restoration Corporation with great satisfaction. So far, my life feels as if I’m on one big adventure. | Krystal: As a native of Michigan, I moved to New York with a limited perspective of the depth and importance of social differences. Having a passion for creativity, I accepted the various ideas behind expression and equality that poured out from this beautiful, diverse place called Brooklyn. After graduating from Pratt Institute in 2006 with a degree in Communications Design and barely surviving the effects of forced independence, I started an open relationship with the nonprofit world and began to willingly become my own person. Since then, I have been employed and freelance as a graphic designer, with tons of exposure to the things that fascinated me as a child. Living in two culturally different environments has granted me a faceted understanding of social norms and injustices that I feel compelled to speak on. Though visual art and design have been my concentrations since grade school, writing and sharing thoughts socially has been my core calling. In keeping my promise to my parents, I have finally decided to write for social impact. Standing up for my truth while seeking and discovering the truths of others is the way in which I've chosen to take that on. So far, I've discovered that the most direct route to societal improvements begins with the coupling of self-awareness and humility.

One Response

  1. Su

    The image that was used in the daily email notice was of a naked woman (hiding her breasts, but naked nevertheless.) Using this image with a title (about body flaws) made no sense. She isn’t hiding any flaws (she’s gorgeous) and the article is about and by a man, not about women (even though there’s the short mention of the woman, with again a fairly offensive picture of someone’s big ass).
    And not only is the naked woman not a woman with flaws, it’s really just a sexy, tempting picture of a naked woman, so using it is inaccurate and, yes, sexist.

    Reply

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